01 redhead your face was too big for your skull i could not fix it that is all

02 phonefree bonewhite goth choirboy named for a religion you hated timetraveling from an era you refused to name way to lie down +take it those screaming baby mice you fed your blonde snake are proud of you still

03 velveteen shirted honesty boy thanks 4teaching me how to swear in german i dont remember a word of it though also i really could have done with hearing less about your sister frankly she sounds awful but whatever the way you took those clamps respect kid

04 jose i could write of 10s of straightboys who told me they were bottoms +werent i pick you cos of that sexy thing you did w pills +your heroic ability to consume them i love watching ppl eat drugs you picked up on it like no1 else ive ever met too bad you were so otherwise confused i think of you when i look at that haring 1985

05 native san franciscan spazz dont ask me that on pubic transit

06 gentle faggot sorry i guess i dont know you did literally ask 4it again +again including on paper

07 skateboarder of ultradark locks i remain in awe of the way you held still 4me that was the bravest thing id ever seen 4a long time after

08 mexican boy w irish reasons when i dig backwards in my thing 4tears youre the modern point of origin i dont even have to craft you some oblique hymn your facts are enough you liked to be tortured til crying while listening to morrissey +you remain the prettiest thing ive ever been inside of

09 gordon i could write of 10s of straightboys who vastly exaggerated their amount of gay experience in a misguided attempt to impress me i pick you 4being the quickest to see its dumbness +how you agreed to get 'punished' 4it even though it wasnt really your thing you took it like weather i write down your observations still

10 harry potter boy from edgeware st none of it seemed to add up the name on the mailbox the stuff in your pocket you sure gave good scream 2cheers 4that

11 unbalanced skinny kid w inexplicable 'walrus' spirit animal rad ass bedazzled eyepatch +horrible hippie name i got off on your tears but that wasnt how i meant to make you cry oops ps that thing w the sandpaper +vinegar file um under 'blown away' in the cabinet of a human being who has seen a thing or 2 way to be rawness itself sadboy number hundred something

12 nintendo savant who was actually extremely fucking attractive you were my favorite 2geek out on knots with tying you up +making you play mario kart was the shit

13 teenager w massively impressive book library what nonsense choices in music you made your tastes in general were so confusing im still not sure if you wanted to do what we did i think you just wanted to have sex maybe the size of your culture did point to virginity astonishing job talking the talk though way to be born with a language to terrify adults

14 boy w birds +too many bracelets you look great in sentence but when i think of you vs that dude who posted on craigslist saying he wanted to be spanked but not called bitch +then spent all night trying to get me to call him bitch i am way more embarrassed that i had sex w you

15 sweden obsessed canadian thank you 4christening my ballgag +4your indomitable curls hope to run into you again someday

16 kid from side of road hitchhiking to nowhere in the middle of los angeles claiming to want to get murdered you were hilarious straight out of 'guide'/'try'/etc an angel of whatever i think of you rarely but intensely i choke on soda sometimes just 4you

17 peroxide number big you had dark skin 1 blue iris 1 black iris hardly any tattoos +your blonde was a mane what a creature to see too bad like so many blondies you cried in the way i am NOT into sobbing when i left +begging me to hold you ugh

18 abstract algebra alcohol bottom i met your 'spiritual top' in a pastry lattice of life events sorry i just couldnt get down w the vibe or the vocabulary but i think often of your eyes +what they held up 2me

19 bottom from a similar place in the alphabet you quaked just from standing near me every single time i cant imagine what it would have been like to actually collar you

20 whippits virgo thank you 4inspiring a future video shot of a balloon inflating at the same rate a cock gets hard

21 central californian born exactly twice 1st believer i used the line 'welcome to being special' on 1st boy i knew w an out of control spirit animal situation a personal herd 23 strong of now wild domestic type dogs remember how i said you werent gay enough 4me +it super confused you it so happens i am embarking a 7year project that will basically illustrate at length what i meant

22 boy with actually worse vision than me in 2002 you made a joke involving the phrase 'find a page for it and click like on it' i really dont think facebook had 'pages' back then or that you were on facebook at the time you also once told me 'i am not leader of the gays i am merely apprentice to leader of the gays' these augur phrases +your choice of lensframes make me think again +again you must still hold the key 2something but what but what you were a horrifyingly bad fuck

23 la crescenta emigrant who read james joyce holy shit youre my forgotten 1st tall korean body fed north american corn you thought i judged you 4being in the closet actually i was super into it but didnt communicate that i guess i was young

24 native warrior into your myth a bottle i place into the bottle a note i make higher

25 talker w heartbeat allow me to put it out there in advance i fucked your son 4eight months straight as 4not being a homo thats the LAST thing his deal w me meant after me he swung wildly opposite to date a churchy makeup girl this too only proves actually how much he worshipped cock +how much his story foretold that bigger 1 at the bottom just as every minor foretells every major the next time this occurs in front of me i will try to be more clear sooner about what is happening oh viney life

26 underwater effort overdoer nope that is not what they mean when they say every part of the buffalo

27 russian cocksucker w so much you couldnt say i wish i couldve expressed that you didnt have to 1 coffee +i knew why those lips were built dont panic im special like that your wishes arent quite written on you yet

28 nosebleed violinist what was your true story i worshipped you 4being gayer +more drugged out than my boyfriend but barely remember touching you what i recall is an article in the college paper about how you had gotten over depression which you super hadnt +another the next year about you getting over alcoholism which you mega super hadnt

29 wrestler w name of 5 capital letters +large false eyelash collection you were great at taking it so im not sure why you appear as you do in my memory i want to respect you but cant was there something you said ive blocked out

30 writer of slash fiction about matthew barney getting fucked by ernest hemmingway did you see by the end of it what i meant by your eyebrows pull together due to something else i admired your haircut i admired a lot of you but not your pets the vast majority of people with pets should just kill them already

31 boy against which the universe intends me to measure all others 4the next little while what to say sorry i kind of made it so you never had a boyfriend while we were together i didnt do it on purpose i didnt think enough about it those layers +hooks +the specific ways in which you got hung up +the sights which made your eyes light they were real i could never have endeavored or bothered to imagine them i hope you find your way back 2the pharmaceutical knight who confessed his pleasures to me at dark itd suit me rad if you never found your way back to me personally as a person but as all things are signs imply thats not what the universe has in mind